October 19, 2010

Introduction to the Corridor Theories


The Corridor Theories are those that attempt to elevate your standard of written English. While nonsensical in nature, these theories are splendid, scientifically proven methods to, in layman's terms, waste your time. Nonetheless, the theories generally are able to provide entertainment to a certain degree(in one form or another).

What, exactly, is a corridor?
till the end of time

General definition[noun]: a long, narrow passage in a building or train, with doors that open into rooms.
Take a break, and listen to this hauntingly peaceful melody while you take it in.

I hope you have the song playing whilst you readth these verses~

Lets not stray off the path. This is not a English lesson. It is our task to explore the metaphorical, 'subversive', parts of the word.

Originally coined as blasphemy, the metaphorical regions of corridors have never been explored, let alone applied. [Note: Corridor(an alias) once tried to utilise this theory to change the world for the better, but sadly was hunted down by laughter artillery and ridicule snipers. He now lives under another alias borrowed from a well-known car company] A corridor is a corridor. -anticlimax However, to the trained eye, it represents= distance/area travelled.

Experts argue that displacement is the correct unit for velocity(this will be used in a later theory), however, displacement cannot be applied to the Corridor Theories. This will be explained later in great detail, for now, it is also because distance has no direction.
(this is a gross oversimplication, but it is enough for now)

Until next time-


Fun Fact: the author [Corridor] spends a lot of his time patrolling corridors when he is wearing a maroon blazer.

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